All of us have our own personal bubble, which is really the physical distance we keep between us and the person we are talking to. The size of this bubble varies according to who we are talking to as well as our mood at the time of talking. This bubble is no doubt influence also by our culture.On hindsight, I notice from a few occasions that, when my western friends and colleagues approach me, they tend to come into my personal bubble. Don't get me wrong - I am really ok with it, as I usually can adapt quite well to different cultures. It's just that I find that quite interesting as an observation (or is that just my imagination?).
There is this European colleague, whom I've spoken to a number of times before, on the phone but have only met for the first time two days ago. This morning, in a conference reception, he came over to have a chat with me and he walked right into my bubble. While he is a more senior staff, I do not report to him and there is no issue of authority between us. In fact we were having a casual smalltalk conversation. I found it quite amusing really that we were standing almost at kissing range (we are about the same height).
While the Western culture is generally known to be more open, it is also a culture that tends to value privacy more than most Asian cultures do. Asians, on the other hand, often claim to have a culture that is more welcoming and warm. So it is really quite interesting if Westerners actually practise a smaller personal bubble.
The other thing is that I'm not sure whether it works the same way if I was the one approaching the other person. Say, if it was I, this morning, who went over to the colleague, and stood so near him, would he have felt as comfortable? Once again, I am really not complaining at all (not especially when the other party is rather pleasant looking :p ). I'm really simply amazed and curious.
All this of course is my own opinion and observation. So, I stand to be corrected.
5 comments:
Very perceptive piece about bubbles.
Sometimes the western bubbles dont exist at all and that why there is so much violence in the UK in particular. And soemtimes the asian bubbles have so much internal gravity - like a black hole - the person trapped inside never reaches out of the bubble. But this is not true of the Sun up Sun down blogger, I feel, who should really be using his perception doing another kind of job :)
thanks John
Ta bulle, on dirait de la salive. Trouve donc une meilleure image. Sinon, je suis d'accord : la distance interpersonnelle limite occidentale est probablement inférieure à l'orientale (ce qui ne veut pas du tout dire que les Occidentaux soient plus chaleureux que les Orientaux) - sauf dans les bus indiens, évidemment !
C'est pas une bulle de salive! C'est une bulle de savon.
Asian to asian, we tend expect a common cultural understanding with each other. The way we are brought up, taught and the way we behave with each other, we assume are similar. Personal assumption and expectation keeps us apart.
Here's a little social experiment. "Hi! How are you today?" ask between strangers in. Asian to asian (ask both in native language and in english), asian to westerners, westerners to westerners and westerners to asian.
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